Decluttering my Soul

Since the end of 2018 until the first 2 weeks we have been doing a house clean up. Living in a small space, we needed to free up some area so we can fit in. We checked every area of our house for unused items that can bless others. To be able to accomplish this, my husband and I tried our best to free up our schedule to focus on our priorities. We have noticed that we tend to dump a lot of items in our home and a major clean up is needed so we can have a fresh start.

I am not an expert in organizing our home. My husband is, and he does a better job in doing it. He checks our pantry for expired items and he does an inventory of what we have so we would know what we need...because the more stuff there is in our home, the more I become anxious and the more work that needs to be done. I am grateful that through our situation now, God taught us the simplicity of life by just living on what He blesses us with. If not for this, the more anxious and worried I can be.

But not just in our home, because of the extra load of the holidays I somehow felt overwhelmed. Routines may go by the wayside and clutter slowly takes over. I felt lost and needed some space and time to go back to our routines with life and homeschooling.

The same is true with activities. I have learned to say no to some invites and just choose what fits our family and our schedule. Freeing up some space in my calendar was a big help because the more activities that we have, the more hurried we feel, the more time was taken out from our family, the more possibilities I will not be able to have my quiet time with the Lord, the more our house gets into a mess and the more tired and weary I become.

When I am not at peace, nothing in our home is at peace.

Decluttering is not just for our home but for our soul as well. I have realized that my heart can be the same way —— cluttered with anxiousness, what ifs, worries, responsibilities, duties, concerns about the future, finances, frustrations, disappointments, critical attitudes, and negative mindset. All of these added together can tend to create soul piles and heart clutter. If I don’t take the time to sort them out, my spirit becomes a mess, and my heart becomes overwhelmed and weary.

So is our home, when my heart is a mess our home is a mess too.

It creates tensions, critical and temperamental emotions, misunderstandings, ugly words and unhappiness. A messy heart cannot serve a home joyfully.

This is the time when I allow the thief (Satan) to steal my joy.

At the beginning of the year, I ask God to help me clear my heart trashes. I wanted to start fresh so I can be at my best to all the people I encounter with.

I also made time to review and reflect on the year that was. Goals that I have missed and reasons why I missed it. Routines that I want to change and improve. Habits that we want to teach our children and values we want to impress in their hearts.

I think of things that I also want to improve and strengthen in major areas of my life:

Physical - our diet
Relationship - with husband, children, parents, relatives and friends
Spiritual - quiet time, ministry and discipleship
Growth - books to read, journaling and what to study
Finances - being a faithful steward

There is a long list if I will go through all that I want but I can only focus to 2 to 3 things at a time.

One important thing that I felt I needed to prioritised and thus needed much work is my relationship and intimacy with the Lord. If I wanted to grow deeper in His knowledge I have to work on my spiritual muscle.

This needed a morning routine.

I prayed and asked God for the grace to allow me to wake up early while everyone else is asleep. And He did.

I started waking up at 5am and would go out our balcony or have a morning walk to pray and smell the fragrance of the morning. This soothes my soul. Then I would prepare my hot coffee, play worship songs and will lit a candle, so I can start reading my Bible and devotion and journal my thoughts. It would always give me a good start and would fill my heart with what I needed before I greet my boys in the morning and face the day, but I needed to discipline myself too so I will be able to get up before the whole household does. If I want to be consistent with this routine I also needed to sleep early. We started to have our bedtime at 8:30pm to give us enough time for our bedtime blessing.

God made me understand that a daily quiet time is foundational and it shapes the soul. There were mornings that I still feel hurried but I would always discipline myself to sit down, slow down, worship, pray and read some Bible verses to help me through the day. Otherwise, I will be empty and will not have anything to give.

I felt that it is the most important thing that I need to keep me from giving of what is asked of me. If I missed it, I become temperamental and mood swings would kick in. Thus, the temperature in our home is affected.

After this first 2 weeks of quietness, I found what God needs from me. My heart, my priorities and my time. I would give Him the first hour of my day so He can fuel me for the rest that is to come.

As I was also trying to do my goals for this year, and prayed about what He wants me to do. God answered me in a fascinating way, making me realized that HE IS MY GOAL. If there is anything that I should pursue first, it is Him. Then everything will follow. To focus on what is eternal rather than the temporal.

“ You will seek me and find me if you search for me with all your heart” - Jeremiah 29:13

Establishing a quiet time routine is a positive lifetime habit. The most important habit above all else. Where we meet with God in the quietness of our hearts. It becomes a way of life.

The decluttering that I needed allowed me to know that God is my breakthrough. He cleanse my heart and He listens. I felt closer, loved and more intimate with Him. Just like the first days when I surrendered my life to Jesus. He renewed and recharged my soul.

Though as days past by, weeds may come into my heart again but I will always be reminded that Jesus has overcome everything that I needed and I can always go back at the cross, soaking in His love and listening at His feet. It is like being saved again. Yes, we always need Jesus to save us each time we fall. It is only by His grace alone.

Decluttering is going back to the cross. No one else can clean up the weeds and the trash in our hearts except Jesus. Come and spend some time with Him and receive His fullness and love.

“ Let the morning bring the word of your unfailing love for I have put my trust in you show me the way I should go for to you I entrust my life” Psalm 141:8